Mind Your Manners

Nine month old puppies can be a challenge.  Especially when you are nine months old and you weigh 75 lbs!  A few weeks ago we decided that in order to save our sanity, our home, and possible jail time for animal cruelty, we needed to do something about the puppies behavior.

The out of sight fencing has been a huge blessing.  Coal now has room to run and we are all happier.  But we still have to stop the jumping and the mouthy behavior before we end up looking like human chew toys.  We tried the board and train route and that helped, but it is difficult to really understand what they taught him during the 9 days he was there is less than 20 minutes.  Don't get me wrong, he was better but we still had issues.

I know he really wants to be a good dog, I can see it in his sad brown eyes, so we signed him up for adolescent obedience training at Support Dogs.  I wasn't sure what to expect and I was hoping for the best.  I'm not sure about the training at the local pet stores and most other training offered in this area is done in a drop-off/pick-up way.  No offense, but I need the repetition as much as Coal does!

Last week was our first class.  Coal barked and barked and barked and jumped and barked and barked.  He was so loud that even when the training was yelling, you couldn't hear her.  We finally got him to settle down and started our lessons.  It was the first week so it was a little chaotic and we didn't do much but we had some hope.

Today we had our second class.  There were twice as many dogs this week which was actually a good thing for us.  Coal needs to be around other dogs to get used to them.  We waited for our instructions, and Coal laid on the floor and didn't make a sound.  What?  Was this the same dog who wouldn't shut up last week?  Yep.  He was very well behaved during class.  He barked once and compared to the other growling going on, he was one of the angels in the class.  Next week will be the challenge - we have to come across the room without being on a leash.  I guess we better practice!

Rock 'n Roll Lifestyle

Sometimes you just need to party!  Remember back before you had a mortgage, car payments, a career to worry about and life was strictly lived for the fun of it? Sleeping in late was the norm not the exception and the number of hours spent working was the minority? Yeah, I can't really remember that far back either.

We have several friends that play in local bands and we try to be supportive when we can.  Often they are playing far from home or on a work night, so we don't always get to support them as much as we would like.  However, this weekend ended up being a perfect storm for our local band coverage!

Friday night, we went out late to catch a friend who plays in a band called Contagious.  Yes, that is their real name.  I'm not sure who came up with that name and not sure why you would want to have the word contagious printed on your panties but, hey I guess it is a good marketing tool!  As usual, the guys were great.  I'm not sure I completely agree with their set lists, but who am I to argue, they are booked all the time!

Saturday afternoon, we went out to support my colleagues who just started playing under the name Spent.  They were the entertainment at a local parish picnic and they sounded awesome!  This was only the second time they have played in public and they had their own set of groupies (about 6 or 7 little girls camped out right in front of the stage!).  We had fun and the weather partially cooperated - it wasn't raining but was a little cool and windy.

The guys finished up around dinner time and we met another musician friend and his girl at a local mexican place for dinner.  He played earlier in the day at a benefit so we missed his gig.  We had a nice dinner and then meandered off to a local dive bar to hear another band play.  I can't recall the name of the group but they where a bluesy group and their female vocalist rocked Etta James!

We wandered away in the middle of their second set and went to a biker bar.  It was an honest to goodness biker bar and all I can say is that a vast majority of the guys in the bar were absolute giants!  Appearances aside, everyone in the place was super sweet and we had a great time.  The band was incredible and if you ever get a chance to catch an American Bleach show, I recommend it - these guys rock!  The best part was when our musician friend got to join the band on stage for one of our favorite songs!

I was an incredibly long day and it has been a really long time since I have been able to say that I caught 4 bands in one weekend!  Now I think I need a nap before I go back to being an adult!

MisAdventures in Air Travel

I am not what most people would call a Road Warrior, but I do my fair share of travel for both business and pleasure.  I have gotten used to the "airport shuffle" - pack bags, find parking spot, grab shuttle, check bags, navigate security, find gate, board plane, fly, de-plane and start the whole shuffle over again trying to get your luggage, rental car and find the hotel that is tucked away in the middle of nowhere. I have learned that you can't really be in a hurry or your are going to drive yourself crazy.  Learning how to kill hours in an airport has become one of my special skills in life!

This morning I worked from home because I had a midafternoon flight to catch. The 'talky-talky bug guy" (nice pest control man but geez - he likes to talk your ear off!) came by and we somehow got on the topic of travel.  He made an offhand comment about "travel is fun, when it all goes right".  I should have pushed him in the pool for making that comment!

I realized on the way to the airport that I forgot to pack my pj's.  No big deal, I can improvise or - gasp - go shopping.  When I got to the terminal, I tried to get in the shortest line to check in, when I heard a voice call out over the counter "If you are flying to Charlotte and you have a connecting flight, please get in this line over here."  Apparently, there were Air Traffic Control tower issues in Charlotte causing  flight delays.  When I checked in I was assured that even though my first flight was delayed, I was fine because my connecting flight was also delayed so I had plenty of time to make my connection.

So I wandered off to the gates to play the waiting game.  First it was delayed, 40 minutes, then it was a little over an hour, next it was 2 hours late leaving.  When they announced the last delay, all connecting passengers where asked to check in.  While we were standing in line, they made an announcement.  "This plane IS leaving at 6:18 with or without you".  Basically, if we hadn't been helped yet, we had a choice, get on the plane and take our chances in Charlotte or stay behind and try to get on some other flight.  

I was trying to make up my mind when it was my turn at the counter.  The very nice, but frazzled agent was trying to figure out where to send me.  While she was looking up my options, the other agent came out and said "we will start boarding in 4 minutes".  She turned around and ran smack dab into the pilot, who delivered the news - nope, we had another hour on "ground hold". 

Unfortunately, my only chance at a connecting flight was booked full tonight.  I could try to fly to Charlotte and take my chances or I could go home, sleep in my own bed, and try again in the morning.  I decided that I preferred my own pillows over the potential of using my laptop case as a pillow on the floor of a crowded airport terminal.  

I have to get up at the b-crack of dawn to catch a flight, but I should get to Wilmington before the activity start!  Oh, and I need to grab those pj and throw them in my suitcase!

ID10T Part 3

It seems that I am living in a vacuum. Despite the reports to the contrary, it appears that no one is really interested in giving me a bid on my upcoming bathroom remodeling job.  

You've heard all about my run-in with the first wanna-be contractor.  Well, a few days after I got all my frustrations off my chest by opening blogging about my troubles, wanna-be contractor #2 called.  I wasn't sure this person would ever materialize because they weren't hounding us seconds after we returned from the home improvement show.  But they finally called and I spoke to a very pleasant woman on the phone.  

Given that I was getting ready to leave for a business trip, and the fact that they like to talk to both buying parties at the same time, we scheduled the appointment for this past weekend.  I have this 'thing' (ok, it is a compulsion) to make sure that things are neat and tidy when someone comes over.  Well, last week was a bear at work so I was too exhausted to clean when I finally got home every night from work.  My plan was to leave early - or earlier than normal - on Friday and clean up the house. I did leave around the time I had planned but was too wiped out to even think about cleaning on Friday night.  Since Sales Guy #2 was supposed to show up at 10 am on Saturday, I was forced to do the unthinkable - set my alarm on a weekend!  

I got up and scrambled to clean the house as much as possible before the expected arrival time.  I managed to get almost everything cleaned up, which was a challenge with Coal running around making a mess behind me.  He would steal the paper towels and shred them all over the carpet I just vacuumed or jump on a counter or window that I just cleaned.  Nevertheless, I finished up with about 15 minutes to spare and we waited patiently for the knock on the door.

And we waited.  And waited. And waited.  Eighty minutes after our scheduled appointment time, we decided the guy was never going to show.  I can't call them because I honestly can't recall the name of the company. I figure that if he didn't call to confirm the appointment or call to cancel then he doesn't really want or deserve my business.

I got a referral from a friend whose Mom had someone who does awesome work, so we will give them a try.  If all else fails, this may end up being a DIY project which I really don't want to do.  This one is way over my head!

Hooshetto Central

Last night Mr. Monkeygirl and I stumbled across the breeding ground for Hooshettos.  We weren't looking for it and we didn't really think it was located so close to our home.  

What exactly is "hooshetto", you ask?  It is more than an attitude, it is a way of life.  In order to become 'hooshetto' you have to remain committed for a very, very long time.  It isn't something that you can easily turn on or off.

'Hooshetto' is a delightful combination of a Hoosier (and not the Indiana kind) and a ghetto lifestyle.  Words can not accurately describe the horror of what we witnessed last night. Alcohol was involved but, seriously, these people need to get a life.

Things started out normal as we met our friends at a local bar. Then the freak show started.  Girls in matching outfits. I mean identical outfits.  I haven't wanted to wear the same thing as my friend since I was about 12 years old. There were couples groping and making out in the corner.  Not just towards the end of the night, but all night long and every chance they got. And apparently it was contagious.  It was isolated to one couple at one table at first.  Then it spread to the other couple at the table.  From there is just got worse, spreading from table to table like the swine flu. It was disgusting to watch but like someone said - it is kind of like a train wreck, you just have to watch. 

The floor show was even better. We also got treated to an excellent imitation of a vintage Anthony Kiedis hair swinging, rockin' it dance.  Some  - ahem - gentleman's clubs hold amateur hours and I think some of the girls thought they were trying out for a permanent position.  I applaud their ability to let go and enjoy themselves but this one girl was out of control!  She started off early in evening with a solo dance.  Dancing by yourself is okay, but generally, it is more acceptable to do this while the band is actually on stage.  Her sexy (and I use the term loosely) move - put your hair in and out of a ponytail. Did I mention that she appeared to be badly in need of a bath and a decent haircut?  She had a little too much too drink (duh!) and many of her 'patented' moves caused her to fall on her @$$ on the dance floor.  She acted like it was part of the show and just went right on back to her own little world.

The drama in this place was a little too surreal.  I seriously can't make this stuff up. The high school dance-like groping was just part of the fun.  The conversations in the women's room were priceless.  Something about someone's half-brothers half-sister doing something was a little too much to try to comprehend.

The band rocked (as usual) and we had fun, but I will always be on the lookout for hotbeds of hooshetto activity in our area.  If this keeps up, we might have to move!

Do Fence Me In

If you haven't been following this blog very closely, you might not know that we have a psychotic dog in our house.  He is craaaaaazy with a capital C!  

One of the biggest problems we have is that we don't have a fence and so we don't really have a good place for Coal to run of some of this excess energy.  We tried going to the local dog park but did I mention that the dog is psychotic? Living on a cul-de-sac that backs up to another cul-de-sac means we end up with a very odd shaped lot that does not easily lend itself to fencing. Running our property line with regular fencing would be extremely expensive as well as butt-ugly!  The only real solution we could come up with was live with the chain untangling and digging or invest in an underground fencing system.  I have heard mixed reviews about these things but we decided to give it a shot.  We could have installed it ourselves, but that seemed like a ton of work (with iffy results) so we hired an expert to install our system.

Nate came out on Wednesday and installed the fencing in no time flat.  If you don't know how these things work, they bury a cable underground and then mark the boundaries with bright red flags.  Coal loves to chew on flags, so he quickly learned that maybe this was no longer a good idea!  He tried to bite the first flag and got his warning signal and he was not happy about this at all!

Yesterday, for the first time ever, we played a wicked game of fetch with Coal in the backyard.  He was untethered and ran and ran for almost an hour.  And when his mommy threw the stick over the boundary line (on accident), he didn't even try to go after it.  This morning, a tasty looking piece of trash was blowing towards him.  He ran right up the flags and laid down and patiently waited for it to blow over the line so he could destroy it.  

So my review after 4 days?  It was worth every penny that we paid for this system.  I can see a huge difference in Coal already.  I'm not ready to let him out without supervision yet, but we are getting closer. What can I do?  I can let him out with a leash and he doesn't bolt.  He will happily lay down on the patio with us and just enjoy the fresh air.  He will actually play and run - fetch, soccer, or just crazy, excess energy running!  The other benefit, I haven't heard him sit on top of the hill and bark incessantly at the bunnies in the neighbors yard. 

He is really good about the boundaries in the back, but for some reason, he is completely freaked out by the front yard.  We can't get him to cross the line even if he doesn't have the receiver collar on.  This makes taking him for a walk a little difficult!  We might have to resort to putting him in the car to take him off our property for walks.  That works fine except for the days that Dr. Evil and his family have a party (which is like every other day).  We will keep working with him and hopefully soon, we can let him go without a leash and he will stay put!

Random Thoughts

• Have you ever seen a 70 lb. dog pout?  Coal is giving me the cold shoulder.  He literally will sit down and turn his back to me.  Sweet talk gets me nowhere, in fact, he will turn his head away from me and stick his nose in the air.  You know the look, the "I'm mad at you and I'm going to pretend that you don't exist" look.  All because we installed an underground fence yesterday.  Someday he will understand that this will give him way more room to run and it will be a much better thing.  For now, I will have to put up with the pouting.
• You should be careful what you put on the back window of your car - it might send the wrong message.  Or maybe I just have a twisted sense of humor.  While in KC, I was following a guy in a huge SUV who was obviously into hunting.  In one cycle of a light, I figured out that he liked to hunt ducks, pheasants, deer, turkey, and dogs.  I know that wasn't the message he was trying to convey, but the way he had the stickers arranged, it kind of looked that way.
• STL to KC isn't very far apart and it is not really worth going through the airport shuffle, so I drove.  Company policy won't allow me to drive my own car so I rented a car.  I'm not a huge fan of rental cars - people like to drive the snot out of them and most of the time it shows.  I picked what I thought was the best looking car in the row and headed west.  This car was different from most.  I really liked this one and I want to own one of my own.  I'm not saying I'm going to buy one, well not yet!
• Welcome back to the blogisphere, MonkeyMamma (aka Sewwhat?)!!!!  We missed you the last few weeks!  Your costumes look awesome.
• I honestly have been thinking about starting a second blog (work related issues).  Does anyone out there have more than one blog  that they maintain and do you have any advice?  Or can you try to talk me out of this? (And to my boss who will read this, I'm not going to write about you but some of the challenges that I am facing trying to change "the process" that I stole the towels about!)