Tonight I think I found the perfect assistant. She definitely has the right attitude and she thinks I am the best thing since sliced bread. She is very petite so she won't need a very big space to work in. And I'm pretty sure I can afford to meet her salary demands (a feathery pink princess crown, a glittery star wand, and some chocolate chip cookies). My 3 year old has volunteered to be my new assistant. We worked on her phone responses tonight - the instructions - whatever they ask for the answer is "no!'.
We didn't get off to a very good start but I was testing the waters. She agreed to a kiss and a big, smoochy hug even though I instructed her that the answer was always "no". We tried again. "Can I have some more money?" I got a timid "no". Now we are getting somewhere. "Can I have some more time?" I asked. The answer "No, dude!" Seriously, she used the word "dude"! If I could only get everyone to use the word "correct-a-mundo" on the phone with her they would get the lecture. It is so cute to hear this little pixie look up at you wagging her little finger, one hand on her hip, and her head cocked off to the side as she is saying "I told you to stop saying that word." What word, we always ask. "You know, correk a mungo." It makes me giggle every time.
So if it wasn't against child labor laws, I would have a new assistant in the morning and would immediately pass an edict that everyone must use "correk a mungo" when calling me and ask her what you call that eight legged sea creature is called. You know the one - the "applepus"!